My favorite newspaper when I worked for a newspaper. Wish I’d saved the one about Bat Boy.

When I was a kid, I totally believed in Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster. Whatever anyone said, Loch Ness could have a dinosaur. I’d read theories. (I was rooting for plesiosaur).

As for Bigfoot, there were still a lot of trees for him to hide in. Bigfeet and Yetis and Nessie were real until proven otherwise. I was like that about a lot of things, UFOs and whatnot.

I used to get a kick out of Art Bell’s show on AM radio. He was into things like that. I liked the one where people lowered a mic into a pit and heard the cries of the damned. Pretty entertaining.

Waking Bear – Bigfoot

Sometime during the recent Covid lockdown I went out for a meetup. The first one of those breaks where you could go out if you socially distanced. One of the ladies was a Bigfoot enthusiast. And boy was she enthusiastic. I wanted to laugh, but I didn’t want to spoil her fun. She seemed so happy.

She had just been on Bigfoot expedition and met the big hairy man himself. Well, not really met him, but she heard him roar, so she knew he was close. He sounds like Chewbacca, btw.

Turns out if you leave an apple in a field and give him a little privacy, Bigfoot will eat it. He loves apples.

Her apple disappeared and guess what was in her tent? That very apple. Bigfoot wasn’t hungry, so he carried the apple to her tent to let her know he was still glad to meet her. “I know it wasn’t a squirrel, because it was a large organic apple!”

Hearing that story made me think of Boy Scout snipe hunts. You might have heard of them. The older boys gave you a tow sack and had you bang two sticks together. They were gonna chase him toward you and you had to be ready to catch it.

Their descriptions were all over the place.

You didn’t know if it looked like an alligator or a skunk and the older boys wouldn’t say. You had to be ready for anything. Then when you least expected it, the older boys jumped out and went “Raaaaah!” They didn’t scare me. Much.

I thought Snipes were imaginary until sometime in my 20s. Turns out they’re a kind of shore bird. You’re not likely to catch one in a burlap sack. Not in the woods anyway.

I wonder if those Bigfoot expedition guides might’ve been Boy Scouts once?